Hey look! I found some testimonials! We've found the cure! See how many people have been cured with Rainbow Unicorn Poop cookies?
"I was like, you know, tired all the time.... I saw these Rainbow Unicorn Poop cookies and I thought, hey, those look pretty good and they're, like, all natural and stuff. So I tried one and it was like wow, you know? I was all full of energy and stuff. Who knew Rainbow Unicorn Poop cookies worked for chronic fatigue? All chronic fatigue syndrome patients should take these, cuz they really work!"
"I was having a hard time with my after-work run. I was tired after only 5 miles! I was falling asleep in front of the tv afterwards. Something was wrong. I realized I had chronic fatigue syndrome. I tried everything -- diet changes, B-12, exercise, CBT. Nothing worked. Then I found these Rainbow Unicorn Poop cookies online, so I had to try them. It was like magic! The next day I ran my full 10 miles after work and wasn't at all tired! These are a miracle cure! All chronic fatigue syndrome patients should take these. They really work!"
"Life was so difficult. Everything was so hard. I searched online and found out I had chronic fatigue syndrome. I was so scared because there's no cure! All the things people were talking about that even helped a little were so toxic. I mean, Big Pharma, you know? I wanted something natural, that addressed the whole picture -- mind, body, and spirit.
I had a long talk with my spirit guide -- she's a beautiful blue butterfly and really smart. She said I needed something beyond the physical. I needed something that was magical as well. I went to several magical supplies stores, but didn't find anything. I was ready to give up when I found these Rainbow Unicorn Poop cookies! You can tell just by how beautiful they are that they are full of power and magic. I mean, what's more magical than a unicorn, right?
I bought seven cookies because seven is a magical number. I ate one every day. Each day I felt a little better. After seven cookies, my life was so full of energy and joy, I could hardly believe it! I was cured! Rainbow Unincorn Poop cookies are the perfect, all-natural cure with none of those harmful chemicals. All chronic fatigue syndrome patients should take these. They are the perfect cure!"