What do you do when you have emotional mini-meltdowns?

Sue Stevenson

Active Member
Do you take yourself off to bed and just sleep it off? I'm wondering if that might not be better than any other alternative.

Usually I just stay awake and begin to catastrophise. I feel completely bereft in those times, like a baby unable to be consoled. I dwell on everything bad and there is no way anything will be better ever ... until I come out of it.

I'm thinking the best harm reduction is to go to bed and listen to a podcast. They are soothing, like being told a bedtime story.

What do other people do to ride out these waves of feeling like you've gone offline from yourself?
 

Empty

Well-Known Member
Important question I think. I suspect there will be some really useful answers.

I listen to this channel sometimes, like yourself:


And started thinking, I would quite like to have pink dreds, (undecided about the snakes) and muscles like that.

And continue with the practice *"Who is emotional?"

*I'm f***ing emotional lol
 
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AquaFit

Active Member
I was raised to pray before going to sleep for thankfulness, help for others, help for self, forgiveness for mistakes. My deep beliefs have matured but I still use that format as it's calming and brings meaning and order to the body and soul and hey, it can't hurt if anyone out there was really listening!

Now that I have my own family I make sure we have a wind down routine where we talk over the day that we just spent, what we'll do or hope for the next day, say goodnight in a meaningful way, and then my hubby rubs my back for about 15 minutes.

I like Debbie Danbrook's music once in awhile - really works for relaxation. I was pregnant and overdue years ago and her Japanese flute playing helped me relax enough to start the birth process the same night. Debbie just put together this free (donations requested) sleep program: http://www.sleep-program.com/

If I wake up during the night, I find something on tv to occupy my mind and usually I'll get tired again soon.
 

Beth from Oz

Active Member
I've been having similar problems, it's been too hot to sleep here in Australia so last night I sat up listening to Sufi music. It's hypnotic and repetitive and unrepentantly joyous. It's repetition is supposed to put one into a state of meditation, or more accurately put the chatty part of your mind to sleep in order to let the heart take over. The spiritual heart is considered the seat of the intellect in Sufism. I know the Ottomans had a form of music therapy for the dispirited, prescribed by doctors.

I've had Depression since I was a kid, and slow onset me/cfs now for many years. I find the most helpful thing is prayer. But then I am religious.

Sometimes when in that state of mind I pray, or listen to a podcast or even just play inane computer games. When I'm really depressed I just work hard to concentrate on the moment, and tell myself that I'll just postpone worrying until tomorrow. I find sometimes I just have to force my mind to distract itself. When I had an MRI once I found it claustrophobic, so I forced my mind to recite the times tables.
 

madie

Well-Known Member
If it's winter, I get my light box out and start using it every morning.

Any time, my mantra is "do no harm." I don't go out, and don't answer the phone. I don't like any kind of tv/streaming, but I try to keep a huge pile of library books close by. When my brain is fried, I read Y fiction.

My favorite listening to calm my mind is Lama Gyurme:
. This doesn't work for me as background while I do something else. The point for me is that it takes me into itself, and I just stop all the nonsense.
 

Ladyliegh

Active Member
We all get down & at times overwhelmed because of ME/CFS. I have eclectic tastes & moods, so it can be hard to find just what will alleviate my negative or depressed mood.
Sometimes a old b&w movie can help & other times a horror or hallmark movie can do the trick. For me it is about distraction, I have to find what will work for That day. If I am mobile, then a quick drive to my favorite fishing spot, beside a mt. stream, fishing for trout will heal all woes. Some girlfriend time can also do the trick, it all depends... a long soak in a candle lit bubble bath with soothing music can work too.
I think it takes experimentation to find what can work for you... I love the unexpected variety of my life & discovering new things that make my mood lighter. (Unless it is new health problems) lol
 

Sue Stevenson

Active Member
Ooh, lovely responses! Thanks everyone!

LOl @Empty - I think we should have group mantra sessions. We can all cut straight to the chase and rather than starting Higher Self and ego-free, we can just dwell in our moroseness and chant together "I am f***ing emotional" over and over.

Then it will soothe us until we are chanting "Who is f***ing emotional?" at the end.
 

Abrin

Well-Known Member
I know this is going to sound SUPER silly but I make up songs to sing to myself about what is going on with me emotionally in order to self-soothe. (I only do it when I am alone....I am too embarrassed to do it when other people are around.)

I've done it off and on since I was a kid and I've read recently that singing can help regulate you breathing and help with distraction.
 

Ladyliegh

Active Member
I know this is going to sound SUPER silly but I make up songs to sing to myself about what is going on with me emotionally in order to self-soothe. (I only do it when I am alone....I am too embarrassed to do it when other people are around.)

I've done it off and on since I was a kid and I've read recently that singing can help regulate you breathing and help with distraction.
That is too cute... I have made up songs for years to sing to my kids & pets. I never thought about doing it for myself...lol
 

Empty

Well-Known Member
This channel may be helpful if it is not part of an ME symptom eg. PEM, when rest is the best thing.

 

Paw

Well-Known Member
This channel may be helpful
She was a bit tricky for me to get into, as she seemed to be promoting a sort of self-blame -- which felt to me disempowering (whether in a political or personal sense). But I started to appreciate where she was coming from near the end when she questioned whether one's bitter disappointment in Trump voters was actually a disappointment in oneself for not understanding how people could act that way.

But she's not talking about beating ourselves up -- or, for that matter, withdrawing from the outside world. She's suggesting an inward focus as an alternative to bitter resistance, because an honest examination of our lack of understanding is much more useful than resistance. Curiosity, she says, is the key to wisdom. This seems quite helpful, whether peering into our own illnesses (and behaviors) or trying to bear society and humanity.
 

Empty

Well-Known Member
She was a bit tricky for me to get into, as she seemed to be promoting a sort of self-blame -- which felt to me disempowering (whether in a political or personal sense). But I started to appreciate where she was coming from near the end when she questioned whether one's bitter disappointment in Trump voters was actually a disappointment in oneself for not understanding how people could act that way.

But she's not talking about beating ourselves up -- or, for that matter, withdrawing from the outside world. She's suggesting an inward focus as an alternative to bitter resistance, because an honest examination of our lack of understanding is much more useful than resistance. Curiosity, she says, is the key to wisdom. This seems quite helpful, whether peering into our own illnesses (and behaviors) or trying to bear society and humanity.
I am not that familiar with her style, but it is free to access the worksheets etc. http://thework.com/en/do-work#jyn

Here is a description of "The Work" and the process of turning around subject and object.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Byron_Katie
 
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Sue Stevenson

Active Member
@Abrin it doesn't sound super silly at all. I LOVE hearing about other people's inner creative lives. It fills me with total joy. I think it's a really cool way of trying to soothe yourself.
 

madie

Well-Known Member
I think Katie's questions and turnarounds can be very useful in puncturing our posturing behaviors (read: ego). This morning I thought "I can't understand how people could believe him." Is that true? Actually, no, I can understand if I try. Which is also a turnaround - I can understand how people believe what they want to hear.

Returning to the original post, this helps me avoid spinning off in catastrophic thinking. Often the very first thought in the whole chain is not, objectively, completely and undeniably true. Bringing consciousness in at any point stops the whole emotional chain-reaction to a scary erroneous thought.
 

Larry

Member
Do you take yourself off to bed and just sleep it off? I'm wondering if that might not be better than any other alternative.

Usually I just stay awake and begin to catastrophise. I feel completely bereft in those times, like a baby unable to be consoled. I dwell on everything bad and there is no way anything will be better ever ... until I come out of it.

I'm thinking the best harm reduction is to go to bed and listen to a podcast. They are soothing, like being told a bedtime story.

What do other people do to ride out these waves of feeling like you've gone offline from yourself?
Learn to let it flow through you without trying to avoid it. What you resist will persist, It's a law of nature. If you crave something, you will be miserable when you dont get it. If you avoid an emotion, it will take energy from you to suppress it. If you experience it without craving more of it or trying to resist it, it will be experienced and then pass away.
 

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