Struggles in Faith

Curly

Member
I'm 24 and have had CFS for 2 years. The improvement in the last 6 months has been amazing. Everything is slowly but surely improving. But one thing that I seemed to have left behind is my faith.

I have been brought up in a Christian household. Throughout my childhood and teenage years I went to church regularly, sang in the worship group and considered myself strong in faith. However when CFS came along that disappeared very quickly. I felt completely alone and became very depressed. Thankfully I am out of that now but still my faith is nowhere.

I think my main feeling is anger. I was in a very good job helping people. I went from that to being unable to move from the sofa let alone work. I will never be able to work in my past career options again due to the physical elements of the job. I have basically had to start again. Everything has been put on hold. I used to say everything happens for a reason but what is the reason for this?

If anyone is going through similar feelings please do share .Would appreciate any advice on how to move forward with faith.

Many thanks

Ellen
 

Not dead yet!

Well-Known Member
I've been improving too. I started going to a Unitarian Universalist church. It's definitely different, but I appreciate their moral dedication. I'll miss the ritual, but I won't miss the competitive "what do you do?" question in the coffee hour. People there are too busy setting up the next event, organizing some activism thing... etc. And when I mentioned I had mobility issues, their reaction wasn't negative in the least. Even if that's not your cup of tea, I hope you find your way back to a church that supports you.
 

Curly

Member
I've been improving too. I started going to a Unitarian Universalist church. It's definitely different, but I appreciate their moral dedication. I'll miss the ritual, but I won't miss the competitive "what do you do?" question in the coffee hour. People there are too busy setting up the next event, organizing some activism thing... etc. And when I mentioned I had mobility issues, their reaction wasn't negative in the least. Even if that's not your cup of tea, I hope you find your way back to a church that supports you.
Thanks for that! It's so lovely to hear you've managed to keep faith and a find a church that supports you. I'm from the UK and have never heard of Unitarian Universalist. Just looked it up and it looks very interesting! I hope you continue to improve.

Thanks again
 

jaminhealth

Well-Known Member
I too was brought up in so called christian home, but dad confessed when he was dying, he never believed. I started struggling with it all in my mid 30's and finally by my 60's let go...

I too attended Unitarian and then found Science of Mind which for me, was king of them all. Helped me so much when I found it in the 80's...

Now at almost 80, no religion but love the principles of Science of Mind...all positive good stuff. No guilt, no sin no no no...
 

Curly

Member
I too was brought up in so called christian home, but dad confessed when he was dying, he never believed. I started struggling with it all in my mid 30's and finally by my 60's let go...

I too attended Unitarian and then found Science of Mind which for me, was king of them all. Helped me so much when I found it in the 80's...

Now at almost 80, no religion but love the principles of Science of Mind...all positive good stuff. No guilt, no sin no no no...
Thank you so much for your reply. Great to hear! Hope you are keeping well.
 
As I was improving, my faith in God never tottered. There is always a reason for what happens; we just can't see the "whole picture.
 

cujet

Active Member
I hope you don't mind me chiming in. This post will be all over the place, like my personality. I'm not religious and have no specific faith (I also don't have any answers) , I have to wonder about the question of why god hates amputees. As no amount of prayer re-grows an amputated limb. The conclusion for the scientifically minded is either that god hates amputees or god does not answer prayer. It's testable, provable and factual. However, it's also clear that there sometimes comes a point in one's life where prayer, belief and hope in God is the only viable remaining option. I'm currently at that point, as my close friends are dying off every week or two. 7 of them so far, all completely unrelated. I have only 1 close friend left. The most recent was this past Friday. 3 so far in this month (November) . And by the way, grief sucks. It sure is hard to believe all this is a coincidence.
 

Apo Sci

Member
I think you should be struggling with your faith. The basis of the abrahamic religious systems are that people make a covenant with the god and expect him to improve their lives in tangible ways. But what actually happens is that it is a bait and switch where they receive nothing but the empty promise of benefits in some unproven afterlife. Anyone would doubt their religion after going through a serious health crisis. In psychology this is called cognitive dissonance.
 
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Not dead yet!

Well-Known Member
I think you should be struggling with your faith. The basis of the abrahamic religious systems are that people make a covenant with the god and expect him to improve their lives in tangible ways. But what actually happens is that it is a bait and switch where they receive nothing but the empty promise of benefits in some unproven afterlife. Anyone with a brain would doubt their religion after going through a serious health crisis. In psychology this is called cognitive dissonance.
This is insulting. To demand that God answer prayers is to deny faith in a plan. How many people have you met that turned their life around after they hit a wall in their life?

I'm not the same person now that I was when I was healthy. Few people survive a crisis and remain the same person. For some people, this *is* evidence of a deity that has a plan for their life. For others, it has no meaning. But to claim that people who find meaning in it are undergoing bait and switch and to form constructions like "anyone with a brain..." that's just insulting.

I suggest that you're oversimplifying faith by claiming that if prayers aren't answered then that's proof of no God. I don't think anyone who believes would agree with that. But many who don't believe take that as the proof for themselves. Unfortunately they then also go around on the internet trying to dismay and upset those who do believe. And that's not nice.

We have enough problems having faith that tomorrow we'll be able to make it from our bed to the bathroom without help. We don't need the bummer squad telling us God doesn't exist too. Frankly, you're being mean to people who are already struggling.

Plus, what you're doing is also dangerous. People in this community have committed suicide. Shaking their faith is not only unnecessary but it can deepen their depression. I don't think I'm overstating it that you could be responsible for hurting someone deeply.

Respectfully, STFU if you're going to insult people who believe in God. It's not your job to change their mind.
 

cujet

Active Member
This is insulting. To demand that God answer prayers is to deny faith in a plan.
Let's be accurate about this:

1) What faith are we talking about? Christianity?
2) What reason would we have to believe that god answers prayer? (If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you) may be a good start.
3) The requirement to "not test prayer/god" is absurd. It's exactly the kind of thing a 5th grader would say when they don't want you to discover the truth.
4) Church of God the Utterly Indifferent is the only faith that is provable.

Ya know, I'd rather have the facts, as they are, and make informed decisions based on the facts. I'd rather not base my life decisions on some writings from ancient and ill informed men.
 

Not dead yet!

Well-Known Member
Let's be accurate about this:

1) What faith are we talking about? Christianity?
2) What reason would we have to believe that god answers prayer? (If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you) may be a good start.
3) The requirement to "not test prayer/god" is absurd. It's exactly the kind of thing a 5th grader would say when they don't want you to discover the truth.
4) Church of God the Utterly Indifferent is the only faith that is provable.

Ya know, I'd rather have the facts, as they are, and make informed decisions based on the facts. I'd rather not base my life decisions on some writings from ancient and ill informed men.
You don't need a reason to believe. Nor is there a requirement to test or not test anything. Nor is there any need to prove anything to anyone. That's the facts.

What there is a requirement for is to be nice to people who are sick and who don't need a spiritual crisis on top of the physical one. I'm asking you to be kind to people who don't agree with your opinion on God. That's all.

Is that too much to ask?

You're welcome to not believe, just as I am welcome to believe (in whatever faith I choose). I have no interest in trying to prove you wrong. However, you are far too interested in trying to prove me wrong. And it's a waste of my energy.

Don't you see that you're just as dogmatic as the worst bible thumper? It's not enough for you to just accept that others do believe, you have to proselytize to them too? And you target the sick for your sermon? I repeat, that's not nice.
 

Apo Sci

Member
@Not dead yet! I hear your concern that shaking people's faith in gods may harm them through increased depression and even suicide. Let me address it.

I did some digging into research on religion and depression. I found this study by Gupta on Hindus and Muslims that showed that they had less severe but longer lasting episodes of depression.


One thing I noted was that the supportive elements of religion, an emphasis on values, appreciation, being less judgmental and practicing forgiveness, have nothing with the belief in deities and are readily accessible to athiests, agnostics and the non-religious. The psychological research on happiness also shows that people who use these practices are happier than those who don't. So let's all work on them. Anyone, even god believers, who doesn't, does so at their peril.

So your concern that people who quit god belief would necessarily become depressed and commit suicide is unwarranted.

It is interesting that several formerly very devout priests became strong athiests after taking a hard look at the problems of god belief. Their honesty is refreshing and their voices deserve to be heard.

 
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cujet

Active Member
You don't need a reason to believe.

What there is a requirement for is to be nice to people who are sick and who don't need a spiritual crisis on top of the physical one. I'm asking you to be kind to people who don't agree with your opinion on God. That's all.

Is that too much to ask?

You're welcome to not believe,

Don't you see that you're just as dogmatic as the worst bible thumper?
Who said I don't believe that there may be a god, or don't pray? I only say that I don't believe the writings of ancient man and I don't have any specific faith. But I do want to think there is something greater than me (but don't know for sure) .

Sorry for coming off mean and hateful. I'm honestly not.

I've had a number of friends die/get sick lately. Of course I prayed for them. Instead of using religion as a panacea, I comfort my currently very sad soul with the fact that I was blessed to enjoy and have much time with my now dead friends. It's possible that others may find similar comfort in times of loss. I hardly think that's mean.

This was my friend who died on Nov 1, 2019. I've lost 6 in the last few months.

 
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Apo Sci

Member
Who said I don't believe that there may be a god, or don't pray? I only say that I don't believe the writings of ancient man and I don't have any specific faith. But I do want to think there is something greater than me (but don't know for sure) .

Sorry for coming off mean and hateful. I'm honestly not.

I've had a number of friends die/get sick lately. Of course I prayed for them. Instead of using religion as a panacea, I comfort my currently very sad soul with the fact that I was blessed to enjoy and have much time with my now dead friends. It's possible that others may find similar comfort in times of loss. I hardly think that's mean.

This was my friend who died on Nov 1, 2019. I've lost 6 in the last few months.

@cujet I'm so sorry for the loss of your friends. Were the investigators able to determine the cause of death in the plane crash? (mechanical failure vs. health problem)
 

Remy

Administrator
There’s a reason most forums don’t allow posts of a religious nature except in certain specific forums. It’s because they almost always get ugly and contentious and are a BIG PAIN to moderate.

We are all adults here and I don’t shy away from discussion of contentious topics just because it’s hard. But I also don’t have a lot of patience for debates turning ugly on topics some people are destined to never agree on.

TL; DR If you don’t believe in God, don’t participate in threads on faith.
 

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